Burn your boats.

There's an old Irish tale of the traveling folk, who when they felt the desire for a fresh start, would set out on a voyage for a new island. Once they found their new destination they would settle in, turn around the burn their boats.

No going back. 

No safety net. 

Forced onward to their new lives.

I decided while in China that I really didn't want to go back to Canada only to sit around and waste my days, when traveling and modeling is where my passion is. So I let my agent know and she agreed that to continue traveling would be a wonderful idea.

So without hesitation I got rid of my apartment in Vancouver. Why pay rent of a place I may not even end up seeing in over 8 months? So thankfully with the help of my amazing mother and sister, they graciously moved my things back home while I'm still over here in China.

It was a strange feeling not getting a chance to say good-bye to my first place. Not even being around to see then end of another chapter in my life. 

But that's only because a new, and even better one had already started.

I just cut the cords. No looking back. Without even a guarantee of a contract yet. 

 Walking out blind.

I just kept telling myself "I'll figure it out, when the time comes, I'll just figure it out." 

A new mantra of mine I have adopted. No "what if" no "I don't know."

Just "I'll figure it out."

And with that I later found out I got a contract to Singapore for 2 months. Somewhere I have been wanting to go for a very long time. I couldn't have been more excited.

And then it was proposed to possibly go to Tokyo after that and then head home for the holidays. 

I was ecstatic. 

I had waited so long for this, it finally felt like all my hard work was paying off. And all I needed to do was burn my boat, get rid of my backup plan, for the cards to be able to fall directly into place. 

Burn baby burn.

After all this wonderful news I for some reason wasn't feeling so well. My head felt a little funny for 2 days or so. Then I woke up around 4AM one morning with the most excruciating headache I have ever had. I burst into tears as my head throbbed so hard it caused me to get sick. I was nauseous, dizzy and could hardly see.

That morning my agency took me to the hospital for a blood test and a CT scan.

I was terrified.

"I need my mom." 

I had never felt something like this before. 

Later that day my booker came back with a butt load of medication for me and said I had "Inflammation in my blood." Which I think was an improper translation, cause that really makes no sense?

So what exactly happened is still undetermined.

But the medication helped and it seems to have gone away, for now. 

The highs and lows of a week China. 

But thankfully I'm all better now and I'm able to look forward to what's to come.

Two weeks to go!

No point looking back at the flames now, instead I'll just let them push me onward.

Ky.xo